All The Young Dudes

ASSASSINATING ALISON BRYAN - The Foaming Jaws Of The Poison People: The Sequel To The Prequel.

I was just ruminating on my previous post, ASSASSINATING ALISON BRYAN - The Foaming Jaws Of The Poison People: The Prequel, after writing, DEFINITION: Poison Person/ People.The memories of Deaf UK [even though it seems like so long ago, since I've participated in email lists and forums, preferring blogs and blogging] are still vivid. The memories are kept buoyant by the incessant warblings of MM, Andy, John Savva, and a scrag of other trolls, suffering delusions of

Of course, to the, uninitiated, the Deaf Community appears as an unruly mob. I thought that at first, until I learnt to apply the principle of human nature to them. They are human, just like hearies. They do things, just like hearies. Repeat that mantra, and you too will overcome your fear of Deafies, and the stereotypical depiction of them as a wild and unruly mob, will dissolve into a sweet mama loves you all, let me take you into my bosom embrace.

This vibrancy is reflected in cyberspace, take your pick

• “Hello darling, last night at the Catacomb was ace!”
• “Hey Jeff, Titter! Titter!”
• “Can anybody here help me with my thesis? I’m studying the effects of hearing people on deaf people during the Black plague. Was anybody alive then? Any help would be appreciated.”

I tend to avoid the ones that are devoid of any intellectual depth, or that harp on incessantly how about nothing in particular. I could forgive you for thinking that the Deaf Community in real life and in cyberspace, is like the Wild, Wild West, because its untamed nature manifests itself via scams, flame baits and trolls “reinforce”, that the civilised people, i.e. the hearies and hearie wannabes use to justify their image of Deaf people as an unruly mob.

How often have you read or heard about parents who were put off by this perception, and used this as a basis for deciding to raise their dead [I'm using the hearing spelling of deaf hear] children using aural means? How many times have you encountered snotty oralies, who are so fixated by their perception of hearing as being unlimited possibilities, that they use any opportunity to debate the relative merits of visual vs aural, by putting down the visual?

Sure, the Deaf Community has its share of errant people. What community doesn’t? Do the snot nosed oralies really think they have one up on us, because they think they are so civilised? Do the hearies that are quick to condemn Deafies for wanting to propagate their culture and population, ever reflect on their own actions?

“As GOD intended, but we are only making a few tweaks. To improve his creation. Honest!”

Unfairly, the entire Deaf Community is judged by the errant behaviour of a few scurrilous characters, just as unfairly the entire Hearing Community is judged by the scurrilous behaviour of its majority. The irony, is that they would be the first to howl and bawl should we judge them all by the same clothes.

Stupid is as Stupid does.

Anyway, my concern today is not with the relative merits of either communities relative moral standing, and relative is the operative word, but with the character assassination of my good friend, G.O.D., aka Alison Bryan. She has been everybody’s punching bag, and subjected to some serious character assassination for quite some time now.

Anybody who rises up to defend or support her, gets caught in the cross fire. They get a hefty does of the same medicine for daring to challenge the trolls received wisdom, that Alison Byran is a meddlesome wench! In fact, as some of you may already know, there are a few of us who inspire this Pavlovian response by mere association. In fact, Alison’s detractors, should all band together and form a business in manufacturing foam, considering the copious amounts that are generated everytime one of us make sense.

If you have read my previous post, ASSASSINATING ALISON BRYAN - The Foaming Jaws Of The Poison People: The Prequel,you will be aware there is a history behind all this, and to make you better, appreciate the absurdity of the tale, which I’m about to tell you,make sure you read that post.

It is seriously becoming quite ridiculous, when Little Lord Fauntleroy, spat the proverbial dummy early last week, because he couldn’t face up to a few issues and decided to, use his former friend Alison Bryan as a punching bag to vent his frustrations. He has done this previously. Compounding the situation, is Lord Fauntleroy’s sidekick, Sexy Betty, who has also worked herself up in a lather over some misconceptions about Alison.

This culminated in some aggressive approaches by Betty and Lord Fauntleroy towards Alison at a recent debate about the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill, in Cardiff, Wales, [UK for the geographically challenged]. Though to give Sexy Betty some credit, apparently, she showed some remarkable restraint in not hitting Alison Bryan with her handbag.

Now Lord Fauntleroy and Betty were there in a professional capacity, and their unprofessional actions have just alienated them from many of us.

This whole sorry situation developed from an incident when Lord Fauntleroy was caught deleting the
membership of another group that Alison had created, and worked hard to
build the membership and activity. Since then, Alison, along with Moi, Joe, and others, have long since been banned from Deaf UK. My crime is for calling him, a dickhead. A fairly innocuous term in Australia. Joe’s crime was for being so impertinent as to stand up to Lord Fauntleroy. Alison’s crime was for copying her own posts to Deaf UK, for her own posterity. Others have since being banned for disagreeing or standing up to the moderator.

There is more going on behind the scenes, which I will not divulge, but writing these posts, have invoked memories of my past experiences in committees. I’m left begging the question, “Why is this errant behaviour from D/deaf people tolerated?”

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ASSASSINATING ALISON BRYAN - The Foaming Jaws Of The Poison People: The Prequel

In its day, Deaf UK was the best email list I’ve been a member of. It began life as a social contact list on e-groups, in the days before it became a yahoo group. The ease of posting sharing news, gossip and events made Deaf UK a popular list, and as a consequence its membership grew. So much so, that many established Deaf organisations. saw it as a marketing contact.

Deaf UK was originally set up by John Savva [do your own research to find out all about him, and I have had a couple of run ins with him - smirk!] whose moderating style was, “Me Tarzan, You Jane!” or in Deaf parlance, “Tarzan Me, Jane You!”. I was roped into joining by Alison Bryan, whom you all know as G.O.D., and then the fun began.

John Savva overcome with laziness, co-opted Alison into co-moderating, which in practice, became moderating. And, John would only show his head [or beat his chest] when things got hectic, he had something important to say, or Alison chucked a spaz, and demanded that he put in his share of the moderators duties.

But having Alison as moderator, was the best thing that happened to Deaf UK. Unlike many moderators [and leaders] whose moderating style is off the status illustrating style, that is, “I’m the boss, hear me roar!”, or the nannying style, “Don’t say anything nasty here. Let’s keep it civilised kids!”, Alison’s style was very much the hands off and let the group set the pace. She stepped in only when the situation demanded it, or when the membership demanded it.

The freedom that Alison allowed the group, is what gave Deaf UK it’s character. Untamed and unruly. Which was very unique in a cyber culture that was trying to be ordered, disciplined and boring. Anything went. And when I say anything went, believe me anything went.

It was expected that many people would be put off by the style and manner of Deaf UK, and they couldn’t deal with the warts and all nature of the group, so they left. People joined expecting yet another deaf and hearing support group [for ****'S SAKE there's enuff out of them out there], or they expected everyone to sit around in a circle, holding hands, singing “Kumbayah, My Lord. Kumbayah!”

Lord, we weren’t allowed to be human by some well meaning folks.

What was amazing, was that some of the most obtuse and up their arses people join, and over time began to actually see through all that bluff and bluster and grew to take it all in stride. [Cue: My Name Sake Tony R., whom I use to bait with glee, and watch as he bit. Bit, HARD! But through it all, he came to see right through me and me in turn began to appreciate and allow him his space. And that is summat that was achieved in a heated environment].

Some came in with the intent of changing the group into a light and love and let’s not say anything nasty, there’s too much out there alright, smarmy new aged, laid back, Californian style [man all this baadddddddddddd energy just vibes me out], and that didn’t work. They got told to piss off!

Deaf UK, was a reminder of how you don’t always learn to respect by biting your tongue and saying nowt. You can learn to respect by accepting the style and personality. Just like the Seven Dwarves, “Off to work we go! Off to work we go!”

Then one day, a cyber citizen came a-roaming over the hill. Who, having eyed the shenanigans with some considerable envy, decided to join Deaf UK. Right away he began to offer his opinions, and all was well with the world. Except for one small, wee problem…. when you engaged in a debate or argument with him, it became circular. So when you responded to a post of his, he would respond to you by going off on a tangent. This would have been OK, if he eventually got back to the point, but he never did. It just got worse, that began to look like he was purely trolling. It’s pointless quoting him, when you can read his blog or contributions at the Tower Of Babble!

Things got into such a state, that a poll was instituted for the membership to decide whether he should be expelled from Deaf UK, or allowed to remain as a member. He was unceremoniously kicked out, and he never got over it. You can argue the toss if you wish, that we could have just ignored him and gone on our merry way, but we didn’t. He was followed by a few members, namely his mate Andy, who quit in disgust at Deaf UK and in support of MM. As a direct consequence, Alison was branded a dictator and control freak, for carrying out a group derived consensual act.

Give it time, and you would think that things would calm down, people would pick themselves up and dust themselves off? But no.

We had forgotten all about MM and his band of Merry Men, until I was alerted to a strand in the RNID forums [now closed due to the libelous nature of some of the postings, of which I have kept copies] bagging Deaf UK and Signing Deaf in general, and libeling Alison Bryan. The slagging got so bad, it was defamatory [Like I said, I have saved copies of the pages], that Alison wrote asking that the offending posts be removed, and NOT TO HAVE THE FORUMS CLOSED. That was an RNID decision.

The gnashing and wailing continued unabated. It had moved to a new forum, under the guise of free speech and democracy. But a cautionary note, I have met Alison, and know her from my time in the UK. Whereas MM, and cohorts only know her [and me] from cyber space.

MM and his fan club, went on to set up their own forum called Deaf Tribes, which I dubbed daft tribes, the land of the scum bags, and in there [without much help from us] they became defamatory again. They just could not let the original issue go. Whihc was MM being banned form Deaf UK.

Quite frankly, if they are not moaning on RNID, they are moaning at the Tower Of Babble and MM, started using various blogs [creating and deleting with such regularity, that blogging became a by word for laxative], to attack Deaf-Blogs [drawing parallels between Deaf UK and Alison's moderation of it, various factional warfares and other paranoid delusions, and then reframing it all to make himself look like the victim] and by extension Alison Bryan, and me because I put my literacy skills to good use when I call the kettle black.

Look [hands out in supplication], I know I [indeed, we] could have been more adult in my [our] responses to him, but he craves attention, so I just give it to him. In spades. Coloured blue. Brits have a thing about swearing, but I enjoy swearing. I’m an Aussie for God’s Sake! It’s an art form Down Unda.

Imagine using AVT [Averting Verbal Teaching] to teach a deafie how to swear! Now that would be an oral program well worth participating in.

Anyway, my friends, this was the beginning of what has turned out to be one continual moan from the poison people [which I will explain in the next post], and a continual source of stress for my friend Alison Bryan. Before I go, I should point out, that the target of MM and his cohort Andy’s derision has expanded to include Joe, Fin, TB, Me….[actually I have always been a prime target of their "insert your favourite adjective here"].

It must be said though, that this all began back in 2002! An awful long time to carry a grudge against someone whom you’ve never met, and only know them as binary code or text on a web page!

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A Bedtime Story: Deaf UK

If the following epistle is familiar, you would be right. I have published it before, on another blog of mine. At the risk of becoming, BORING!, I have regurgitated the post in light of recent developments regarding Deaf UK.

Deaf UK began life as a social contact list on e-groups, in the days before it became a yahoo group. The ease of posting sharing news, gossip and events made Deaf UK a popular list, and as a consequence its membership grew. So much that many established organisations saw it as a marketing contact.

The e-group was set up by John Savva [do your own research to find out all about him, and I have had a few fun, run ins with him - smirk!] whose moderating style earned him the name Tarzan. He roped Alison Bryan into co-moderating, but in practice dumped it all on her turned, making her moderator numero uno into moderating, and John would only show his head when he felt the need to beat his chest or Alison chucked a spaz.

But having Alison as moderator was the best thing that happened to Deaf UK. Unlike many moderators [and leaders] whose moderating style is off the status illustrating style [that is, "I'm the boss, hear me roar"] or a nannying style, Alison was of the “hands off and let the group set the pace” style, and she stepped in only when the situation demanded it, or when the membership demanded it.

Alison’s moderating style was what gave Deaf UK it’s character, and a very unique one. Anything went, believe me anything went, and if you have read my posts or comments all over the web, regarding MM [not the jam], then you will just how wild Deaf UK got. But it was filled with good things too. Lots of good things.

Many people were put off by the style and manner of the group, and they couldn’t deal with it so they left. People expected yet another deaf and hearing support group [for FUCK'S SAKE there's enuff out there], or they expected everyone to tip top and respect each other and just be plain smarmy.

Deaf UK, unlike many other deaf groups I belong too, was an ACTIVE WARTS AND ALL one. What was amazing, was you had some of the most obtuse and up their arses people join, who over time began to actually see through all that bluff and bluster and grew to take it all in stride. [Cue: My Name Sake Tony Roulinson, whom I use to bait with glee, and watch as he bit. But through it all, he came to see right thru me and I in turn began to appreciate and allow him his space. And that is summat that was achieved in a heated environment]

Of course, some couldn’t hack it. Some arses came in with the intent of changing the group into a light and love and let’s not say anything nasty, there’s too much out there alright, smarmy new aged Californian style [man all this baadddddddddddd energy just vibes me out], and that didn’t work.

Anyway, to get to the point, along comes MM who began proferring his opinions. Sure all was cool and sweet. Except for one small, wee problem…. when you got into a debate or argument with him, it became circular [Go over to the Tower of Babble if you don't believe me!] and when you responded to a post of his, he would respond to you by going off on a tangent. This would be OK if he eventually got back to the point, but he never did. It just got worse, that began to look like he was purely trolling.

Things got into such a state, that a poll was instituted for the membership to decide whether he should be expelled from Deaf UK, or allowed to remain as a member. He was unceremoniously kicked out, and he never got over it. His friends [the few he had] never got over it. All the new recruits to the MM way of life, never got over it. They never fucking get over it do they? In fact, no one got over it!

You can argue the toss if you wish, that we could have just ignored him and gone on our merry way, but we didn’t. He was followed by a few members who quit in disgust at Deaf UK and in support of MM. As a direct consequence, Alison was branded a dictator and control freak when she is nothing of the sort [I should know, I met her, I know her, from my days in FYD and in the UK]

I should clarify that the original poll to have MM banned, was expressed by Savva, Tarzan, beloved moderator of the slum corner we call Deaf UK! Of course I don’t like Deaf UK anymore, the Ego’s have landed and shat all over what was once a good group! Anyway, enough, I’m starting to really enjoy this swearing.

Anyway, things did quieten down, and you would think, that after a few months [centuries in cyberspace terms] things would cool down, people would pick themselves up and dust themselves off? But no. No. No. No.

We had forgotten all about MM and his band of Merry Men, until I was alerted to a strand in the RNID forums bagging Deaf UK and Signing Deaf in general,and bagging Alison Bryan in particular [that forum has long been closed. But I still have those pages saved somewhere]. Their modus operandi was to conjure up all sorts of conspiracy theories regarding Alison’s control of all things Deaf in Cyberspace. I imagine they thought she could pull the plug at her house, and bring the whole internet down. The slagging got so bad, becoming quite defamatory, that Alison was forced to write to RNID asking that the offending posts be removed, and NOT TO HAVE THE FORUMS CLOSED. That was an RNID decision.

But no, MM and his Merry Men lifted their skirts, and stomped their high heels, and set up their own forum called Deaf Tribes, which I dubbed daft tribes, the land of the scum bags, and in there they got defamatory again. They just could not let the original issue go. I mean, Alison is no longer moderator of Deaf UK, and still…..Quite frankly, if they are not moaning on RNID, they are moaning on SEE HEAR and MM, is using his own blog, to continue his circular line of reasoning against Deaf-Blogs [drawing parallels between Deaf UK and Alison's moderation of it, various factional warfares and other paranoid delusions, and then reframing it all to make himself look like the victim] and by extension Alison Bryan, and me because I put my literacy skills to good use when I call the kettle black.

Of course I gained myself a reputation by the denizens of the Tower Of Babble. Denizens who define themselves by what they were, used to be, what they think they are, as opposed to who, what and where they are. This reputation I got was cos I jumped in and defended Alison in those RNID forums, but anyway, you are now reading the greater literary talent anyway. So why surf to The Tower of Babble? They just drop their daks, turn around, moon you, and say: “Gee, ain’t I intelligent?”

Look [hands out in supplication], I know I could be more adult in my responses to him, them, IT, but he, they, she, those things crave attention, so I just give it to them. I enjoy using foul language to communicate with them, because let’s face it, you can be as rational, objective and sweet and you would still get dragged around in circles. So you may as well vent your spleen in the process.

Anyway, things galloped along on a great white steed, to last year, long after Alison gave up her moderatorship, back to Tarzan. Who took over moderating duties in a huff, because it interfered with his Tarzan work. If this reads like a fucking soap opera, it is. Anyway, for some unknown reason, John Savva [yes, Tarzan] deleted the entire membership of the Deaf UK events group. He took it upon himself to do this, as a means of drawing attention back to Deaf UK.

Instead, he found himself caught in the headlights of everyone’s anger. Which he promptly dodged and continues to dodge. In effect he is playing the same game that MM is. “Who me? I’m the victim here!” Rather than face up to what he did, he started banning people. I got banned cos I called him a dickhead. Alison got banned cos she was copying her own emails from deaf uk. Jen got banned cos she was forwarding her own emails to herself. Joe got banned cos he, he, he agreed with we all were saying [ I think]… and now, with the recent broadcast of See Hear program about Deaf UK and the Internet [due to editing considerations, only his view was aired], has left a few people’s noses out of joint. One of these days, everybody is gonna get banned for something or other.

I have seen clips of that particular episode, and John Savva is a fucking disgrace. [In fairness, part of the fault lay with See Hear who produced the program]Claiming all sorts of bullshit, for Deaf UK, and FAILING BIG TIME to acknowledge the work that Alison Bryan had done to build up Deaf UK, as well as establish a few other sister groups: Deaf UK Tech, Deaf Uk Events, Deaf UK Jobs….. Deaf UK has 2500 members, of which quite a few are bouncing. Deaf UK does not get 2500 posts a day. It’s not even that active anymore. Besides it has become a  shrine to his himself!

And now some of the Deaf UK members are defecting over to Deaf UK Chat group. And sure enough MM, has surfaced there. True to from, he has even tried to suck hole us by showing us how right about Deaf UK, he was the in the first place. Yeah right… pull the other one.

Anyway, I thought to chuck in some of the comments that were posted from when I originally published the above post:

Ruth said:

It was me who set up The Deaf Tribe in response to RNID shutting down the forum. When the RNID shut down the forum, at first, a lot of people were angry and blamed Alison. This was due to the continuous bombardment on the forums of propaganda by MM and Andy Arse Hole. I later wrote to Alison and apologised for the offensive
remarks on the Deaf Tribe and told her that I had come to realise the true story behind events that happened. I set up the Deaf Tribe only about 3 months after joining deaf forums on the web - and before that I had had very little contact with other deaf people and so I was pretty naive to begin with and knew very little about the background and
history of D UK and various other forums at the time.

MM said:

And
so to bed…… so Hans Anderson and Brother Grimm are still alive and kicking at Deaf-Uk, (And Elvis washes cars in Milton Keynes). I wouldn’t give up the day job if I was you. DUK was and still is, a clique’ and a deaf base to deaf activist trolls, who still deride people who can’t debate without being abusive. Anything goes at Deaf-UK ? (Anything except free speech apparently).

Ruth said:
The Deaf Tribe members set up a new forum - it’s called Smoke Signals and thats their sounding board which I am not a member of!

MM said:

Deaf Tribe ISN’T Smoke Signals, it’s a different site entirely, but then deaf brother will not let fact get in the way of a good bedtime tale, it’s not Deaf-UK so its rubbish !

Ruth said:

Yes MM - Smoke Signals is not the Deaf Tribe. The Deaf Tribe members eventually settled into the new NOT THE RNID forum after the RNID shutdown and the dust settled - but YOU are the one who keeps kicking it up again. It’s old news now..ancient history and times have moved on so why can’t you? It isn’t going to achieve anything, is it?

Ruth said:

Most of the Smoke Signals Forum members ARE the ex Tribe members though MM!

MM said:

Don’t feed the deaf brother troll Ruthie, these deaf fascists are few but they do influence others with their bile.

Ruth said:

MM - follow your own advice!

Further Reading:
Rob Wilks: To Be Banned From Deaf-UK? P2
Rob Wilks: To Be Banned From Deaf-UK?

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Communication: Freedom Of Choice

There is a debate going on over at Deaf UK at the moment, regarding FREEDOM OF CHOICE IN COMMUNICATION. How do I know this? I have been kept informed by friends who are members of Deaf UK, even though I’m not.

So anyway, what amounts to a wank in a teacup, has turned into a tsunami that threatens to tip that very cup off the table,and send it crashing to the floor. Seriously folks, when it comes to discussions like FREEDOM OF CHOICE IN COMMUNICATION METHODS, concepts get mixed, definitions confused and views polarised because nobody is listening.

It all started when the moderator of Deaf UK posted a couple of links to a vidblog of a personal friend, and asking Deaf UK members to visit the vidblog and offer support for their friends bravery [don't ask me to regale that story, it's not important], blah, blah, blah. Fine. What’s wrong with that you ask? Nothing. At least until someone posted to the group asking how could they view the vidblog which was in BSL [British Sign Language], later clarified as ISL [International Sign Language], and then did Aida the Elephant dressed in a pink tutu make her grand entrance doing Swan Lake!

It didn’t take long, but views became polarised, with everybody taking and either/ or position and never answering the original question, and somewhere in the mix questions regarding the moderators ability in moderating the site are raised, along with discussions as to whether Deaf UK is an English medium or a BSL medium.

Well, we can clarify that point quite easily. It is a TEXT MEDIUM. BSL is a VISUAL MEDIUM, so if any of you idiots at Deaf UK are reading this, get clarified about your terminology! To say that Deaf UK is for BSL users too, and discussing it in text, is a nice touch in irony, which is lost on most Deafies. Let’s not even go into consistency territory. Now, I got that off my chest. That feels good.

Now would somebody please tell me, how the hell does a Deafie practise freedom of choice in communication? For most of us, the choice is made for us. Often by our parents, educators or wiser [guffaws] superiors. Myself, I have grown up orally [well, I do have some useful hearing that makes that easy, with the use of hearing aids] and the only choice I exercised, was to learn sign language.

However, if I went to a gathering where the dominant language was sign, and I exercised my freedom of choice and decide to speak, I’m gonna look like a fucking dickhead aren’t I?

Then there are people who think they are exercising freedom of choice, when a situation doesn’t call for sign language. No kidding. I don’t use sign language every day, because I am not mixing with Deafies everyday, and that certainly doesn’t mean I am exercising my freedom of choice not to sign or to speak.

To quote an An ex army mate [who shall remain nameless unless he requests otherwise], puts it succintly:

Choice for me is trying a packet of rice crispies and shredded wheet and choosing one of them based on a personally set criteria. If you don’t, it would be like having a food critic who doesn’t touch the food!

How can you choose one option of communication without trying them all? Where is the choice in that?

And the very fact that sign language is most probably not offered in education (as of mine) is in fact a deprivation of choice imposed by others, you have chosen to continue with their imposed decisions in your adult life - this is a subliminal form of oppression (defined as hegemony). Perhaps if you did receive that choice in your education, you would be able to state that you have a ‘true’ freedom of choice based on personal knowledge and experience.

He goes on to say one more thing, and again, quite succinctly too:

Therefore this forum should accept postings in either English, BSL, international sign or gobbledegook ;), it is up to YOU, the observer, to overcome your linguistic limitations and find your own translation.

However, I do agree with the motion that the moderator should make up his fucking mind as to where Deaf UK is a TEXT or VISUAL MEDIUM, THEN tell people what they need to do if they wish to become members, and THEN ENCOURAGE PEOPLE to take the fucking initiative in order to participate as fully as they can. But right now, all I can see, is utter, fetid stupidity on both sides.

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In Cyberspace, No One Can See That Smirk On Yer Face!

A reprisal of a favourite.

You know that famous tag line for the Movie ALIEN, “In Space No One Can Hear You Scream”. Well, here in Cyberspace, “No One Can See That Smirk On Your Face!”

While I was out walking, enjoying the frickin’ awesome Aussie weather [sucked in you Northern Hemispherans!], I was thinking about my recent post regarding recent events in Deaf UK [DUK]. The amount of fun I had in that group.

I know I’m quite the flamer, and quick with the keyboard tearing off a fiery reply to some jerk, or springing to a mate’s defence, such as when Alison got slagged off by a gaggle of arseholes, in some defunct forum, who think they are the last word on intellect and wisdom.

For those familiar with evolution of human beings, would know that some classes of arseholes eventually morph into trolls. For those familiar with my musings on the web, would know of my weakness, indeed, fondness for feeding trolls. I would throw rocks, but it is physically impossible to throw rocks down one’s dial-up or broadband connection. The only weapon in one’s arsenal is the keyboard and the fingers one types with.

Now, now, now, if you are a bona fide arsehole or troll, don’t make any assumptions about “WHOM” I might be referring, but if you wanna assume, go right ahead. Who am I to stop you. Assume away.

Having said that, a lot of fun can be had in forums, email lists and in chat tooms. But, you all knew that right. Except for that sanctimonious dickhead who starts a fight, then recoils in horror at any reprisals, who then attempts to turn the situation by blaming their victim.

There, I’ve gotten all that off my chest. I feel good! Damn good. Just like James Brown Once sang, “I Feel good! Oww!”

But what about the smirk I refer to in the title of this piece. Well, it goes back to the early days of DUK, when we had discovered the joys of different identities. I played with a few, Dr E H Perfect, Brother Divine, to name two. My best moment was when I created Tasha, a Deaf girl from the Northern Territory, Australia.

That was a fucking hoot that one. Tasha [such a sweet Porn star name, in an LA kinda way. Her online ID was Dizzy Miss Lizzy]. Read her introductory letter:

Hello? My name is Tasha. <fingerspell> T.A.S.H.A.

I am living Australia. Darwin. Top of Australia. Hot. Hot. <Bub
Bar!>

Me not working. Me on dole. Not worry me too much. I positive
mind. Believe true will get job soon. Want work what? Do anything now. Money need, Want. Me hope one day visit England. Sound exciting place. like weather, rain, rain, all time. True? Friends mine say, Why visit England want? I said, because, History. have lots old ruin, things.

Hope you write me. Like make friends want.

Smile

XXXXX

Of course a gallant gentlemen came to her aid:

Hi Tasha,It’s nice to read you in Deaf-UK newsgroup. I’m sorry you’re in dole but yes you will get a job soon. if still not, have you ever thought of setting up a business and be a rich Deaf woman of Darwin?

Ah! Yes we have lots of ruined buildings in all over the UN! Some looks they’re going to fall down onto my head in some olf towns! Terrible!! Yes lots of rain, but I’m used to it. Is there lots of sun in Darwin? is it great and beautiful place? Is it good to not have winters there? Are there
lots of opportunities for deaf in Darwin…like Deaf Arts? Please tell me about Darwin. I can tell you more about England if you tell me about Darwin. I’m looking forward to your next e-mail soon.”

What!?

I just couldn’t resist it could I. I just had to reply, using my own name:

Hi Tasha (the new girl to deaf uk). I am a fellow Aussie living
in Birmingham. I have a hearing partner. Yes, I can tell you England
is full of old ruins, like Birmingham. you better off staying in
Darwin where the weather is nicer than here. And the people too. I have
been coming here for five years. There are more opportunities here for
deaf people, arts, theatre, university. But Australia has a
better lifestyle. If you want, I will be happy to show you around,
maybe introduce you to some of my friends. My partner has been to
Australia Twice. He likes it. What would you like to do with your life.

I know you must be bored on the dole, but I was too. You must
keep positive. Keep in contact with Deaf-UK. You might make some
friends (for life) and maybe it will lead you to more opportunities, or
maybe a holiday here. What are your interests? Write again. I hope to
hear from you. I think my heart is missing Australia a little
bit.

XXXX

Tony

Come on Aussie, Come On, Come on!

Such a frisky and friendly girl. I couldn’t get over her personality. If I were straight, I would do her.

Hello Tony. Pleased meet you. Nice know have other Aussie England
live there. Friends mine tell me boring. Mean England not you.True?
Not really? Not matter me, me want have look myself. Maybe one day us
meet. OK? Good!

Heard England have Deaf Television called See Hear. me finish saw
video, copy. friends bring back. Alright. But why obsess too much of
gossipy things? What wrong with deeper thing like culture. What us
want know how many deaf have, why? What for? Mean, man See Hear, he
say before, Did You Know that…? I say, Yes I know! But me patience.
Me watch, watch. Focus. Some things good. For example, Deaf Arts, sign
language other countries from.

Other exciting happen, Australia this year. What? WDF? WFD? FWD? FDW?
Spell wrong. Doesn’t matter! Me not going anyway. Save money, holiday.
Disappoint still, want see about Deaf Arts.

Question me ask you. Want know about FYD. Heard about that? How I find
out information more. Heard something plan Sydney, but happen nothing.
I want involve like that, make me more confidence build. Please tell
me contact who. I write tot hem ask them more information. OK? maybe
they can write this group?

Anyway, me go now. See you later. Ta!Ta!

Tasha

XXXXX

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